Friday, April 6, 2012

Fun Time WIth Family!

My sister came and went. The whole thing was pretty awesome except for one awkward moment when she hit me in the funny bone with a Wii remote whilst performing a full neurological work up she didn't know she was going to be performing the second she set foot inside my house.

Somehow, despite my fastness at demanding free medical care, she managed to get in the obligatory, "Where's your couch? OMG you eat on the floor?!"

Question: What are you supposed to do when your sister is obviously mentally deranged? PLEASE NOTE: Im asking for a friend (my sister).

"You're fine." She said as I recovered from her violent, improvised exam.

LIAR!! She obviously knows NOTHING about diagnosing symptomless brain tumors!

I did not have time to dwell, though I inwardly questioned her medical credibility. Mr. Awesomecool was working late in a most epically un-cool fashion so I had to make dinner. Luckily (or not) for everyone except me, my un-diagnosable, symptomless brain tumor did not prevent me from cooking something gross.

I served up boiled lentil realness on the eating rug. To distract her from her disappointing meal, I turned on the TV. FUN FACT: Watching an interesting TV show while eating a boring meal makes it taste better!!

Our new most favorite show ever is Ru Paul's Drag race so ever the perfect hosts, we let her chose to watch it with us.

My sister was not quite as into it as we are. I inwardly questioned her ability to be related to me. In a flash of brilliance, I went to the bedroom and brought back a tiny pillow. FUN FACT 2: Wild and crazy TV shows are more enjoyable when you have a tiny pillow to sit on!!

With her tiny pillow, she instantly became nearly as in love with drag queens as we are.

Question 2: Naturally, after watching three seasons of Drag Race my kids both want to be drag queens :(
How do I gently destroy their dreams by breaking it to them that they're both already girls? :(

After a few days of similarly wonderful family time, I woke up at four in the morning, put my sister through a 12 minute BodyRock which left her nearly catatonic on the floor, got her safely and catatonically to the airport, dropped her off, became miserably, hopelessly lost in the airport for an hour before getting miserably, hopelessly lost outside of the airport.

It was the perfect end to a perfect visit. Obviously.


James said...

"I served up boiled lentil realness."

I read this, realized what you had watched, and realized you were my soulmatel

SuperFantabulous said...

Bitch, please, we've been serving up soulmate realness for over a year now.