Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Mildly Amusing

I had a somewhat odd day today. First I found the Wonder Twins were going to accompany me to watch yet another Longhead performance. That was perfectly wonderful in my book. That meant I only had to teach one class (more on that later) for the day.

We left after our permission asking, bowing session. I brought my bag and it's entire contents in case something happened and I did not return to work. You really never know how your day is going to turn out, here.

We walked to the bus stop and thanks to my preference for wearing dark colors I was immediately roasting. Not only that, but I did this workout this morning:

It kicked my tight ass. My legs were really not all that interested in functioning and my arm was certainly not interested in holding up my ginormous bag.

After an excruciating trek, we got on the bus. 20 minutes later, it began to seem like the purpose of our excursion was to ride around on the bus and chit-chat in Korean all day. That was also fine by me. But eventually we got off the bus.

Turns out, we had to walk, like, a mile to get to this school. My bag strap was digging into my shoulder, my lunch jabbing my ribs. I was dying of thirst. Mr. Giggles had brought his baseball cap but, instead of wearing it, he held the brim over his eyes to shade his face. I found this mildly amusing.

Finally we arrived at the school. The Wonder Twins had no idea where the class was and it didn't occur to them to ask anyone. We went up and down all the stairs and up and down all the hallways in the school before someone let us know that we were in the wrong building.

After much wandering and painful stair climbing, we made it to the right classroom. We watched about five minutes of the Longhead performance when the bell rang. It was over. There was no traditional question and answer session complete with refreshments. There was nothing left for us to do but go back to our school. So we did.

By the time we got back I was over-heated and completely exhausted. All I wanted to do was take a nap. I ate my lunch and watched an episode of Breaking Bad instead. Mid-way through the episode, some Korean children appeared in my English Office. I wondered what they wanted.

"Class time, teacher!" They said.
"What?" I had no idea what they were talking about.
"Class time!"

It was then that I realized I had completely forgotten about my afternoon class. I strolled in the general direction of the classroom while the kids pumped their little arms wildly, demonstrating that I should move a little faster. A slow power walk was all I could manage.

I ambled into class to find the students in an uproar. They were much, much too hot to study English. They wanted the fans on. The Princess went over to a fan, examined it and shook her head 'no'. I believe this was my first experience with 'Fan Death' theory. The only problem I could see with the fan was that it had dust on it. Maybe she thought they would choke to death on tiny airborne particles of dirt.

The kids mutinied. They ran for the fan switch and flipped it on. The Princess turned it back off. The kids ran in a swarm to turn it back on. She erased a few of their group stars. I was 100% with the kids on this one. I really have no idea why she wouldn't turn the fans on. All I knew was that I was about to pass out from heat stroke.

After that it seemed pretty unlikely that any English was going to happen. Instead a the kids used the class time to hone their 'Outraged Debating' skills. When the fans were a lost cause, they fought to have the 'Air Con' turned on, when that didn't work, they began randomly opening and shutting the windows. Finally the kids had to settle for having the slidy doors into the hallway partly open.

It was a bitter compromise. From then on, the little, sweaty warriors refused to participate and complained loudly about the fan, air con, door situation. At the end of the carnage only one group had a star left. Even worse, one group earned a scary 'Red Frowny Face of Extreme Disappointment' that I have never seen before.

Despite being on the verge of melting into a confused, exhausted puddle, I was able to gather just enough strength to find it mildly amusing.

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