Sunday, May 16, 2010

I Dig A Pony

I've got some fairly large and quite misshapen news. But first I have to tell about the dream I had last night. Normally I don't share my dreams because it bores me to death when other people try to do so with me, but this one was impressive.

First I was going to university in Seoul. I was on the top floor of what seemed like a dormitory. Suddenly a flip went off in everyone's head and they all went from the edge of reason, to flinging themselves into the ocean of insanity.

Everyone had a gun and they all pulled them out at the same time and started shooting each other. Somehow I ended up without a gun so I ran to the stairwell where I found Patty the daytime hooker. She was high on meth, but given the circumstances, we decided to stick together anyway.

We were running down the stairs when a fat guy with a receding hairline and small round metal framed glasses wearing nothing but a wife-beater and boxers burst into the stairwell above us. He had a revolver in his hand and which he waved threateningly in our direction.

He made a mad dash down the stairs, trying to get a better shot at us. We went down a flight of stairs then I pulled Patty the daytime hooker out onto the next floor. We dashed down the hallway, dodging bullets, to the stairwell at the other end of the building.

The guy didn't seem to follow us. We made it to the bottom floor where we found ourselves in a glass room. We could see outside and into the first floor of the building where people were still shooting each other like crazy. Patty hid under a bench. I shrunk back into the corner, hoping no one would see me.

The room went dark. I could hear people moving around but I only saw small flashes of light as people fired their guns. A woman appeared next to me. She was wearing a black robes and a black veil on her head. Her skin was deathly pale. Her eyes were cloudy. Out of the darkness she found me. She grabbed me around the neck and put her face inches from mine.
"I just want to eat bread and chew it in their faces!" She hissed.

Last night we watched Kick Ass. I thought it was a good movie. Mr. AwesomeCool picked it out for 'Family Movie' night. Turned out it was way to violent. We watched 'Hot Shots' instead. I had forgotten how lame the early nineties were and what a douche Charlie Sheen is.

So now for the big news! Can you guess?? I'll give you a few spaces to ponder before the ginormeous reveal . . .

Mr. AwesomeCool and I have been offered teaching positions in Spain!! It starts next fall and there are many contingencies.

1. I'm not going to a tiny pig farming town in the middle of nowhere like last time . . . Who am I kidding! I totally would!

2. We have to figure out how to get our Spanish visas. We're not very smart. This could be our downfall.

3. I guess there are just two contingencies. This contingency is completely superfluous.

4. Wish us luck!


Mister Baekseju said...

Mazeltov! Congratulations. You'd be a train ride far from Madame Baekseju and I. You'd be more than welcome to spend a week-end at our place whenever you wanna visit Paris.

SuperFantabulous said...

Thanks! If we make it over there, we'll be sure to take you up on that offer. We would love to see Paris again!

DrugstoreCowgirl said...

Wow that is so cool! Spain looks beautiful. My friend lived there for 6 months and loved it! How did you find the jobs?

SuperFantabulous said...

The jobs are through the Spanish government. We're hired to teach in public schools.