Friday, January 1, 2010


The days are long, the years are short. I can't believe its already a new year. Of all the holidays, New Years is my least favorite. Why celebrate the passage of time? It's depressing.

Somewhere around 25, time goes into warp speed. The years literally fly by. Suddenly, your babies are pre-teens. I was looking at old pictures and those little fat babies I had have morphed into tall, skinny girls.

I'm not exactly sure how that happened. I don't remember that happening. I'm not going tell you to cherish every moment when you have kids, or if you have kids, because it's impossible. When those babies have disappeared before your eyes, you'll feel guilty that you weren't paying loving attention to every second.

Sometimes you just want to put them in a closet and watch movies all day. Some days you'll want to hit the rewind button and tell yourself to take a vow of celibacy. It can't be helped. If you're lucky, you'll eventually find yourself with some reasonably well adjusted kids. That's the best any of us can hope for.


Enormous Plumes of Smoke said...

God, this post really sounds like me. I know what you mean. I've been depressed all day. And thing with the guilt and looking back at the kids... Its a horrible feeling. I often feel like I was too selfish as a mom but then sometimes I'm all "who cares.. Leave me alone. I'm watching tv."

Expat Wannabe said...

Haha! Exactly! There are many of us out there, most of them just won't admit it! Fuck it. We did the best we could.