Thursday, September 17, 2009

Expecting, Unexpectedly!!

I blame the fact that there was a recent addition to my family. That is when it started. Now there is a baby frenzy going on. Several members of my family keep saying things like, "You should have another baby!" and "Why don't you have another baby?" One even went so far as to call me selfish for refusing to get pregnant.
Little do they know, that when I sleep, I am far more accommodating. Aside from the naked at school and have missed the whole term, but have to take a big test dreams, I have never had recurring nightmares. Not even the teeth falling out one, or being chased, or trying to scream and having no voice. Now I'm having pregnancy mares!!
Last night I dreamed that Mr. AwesomeCool and I were in bed, discussing having another baby.
"Are you sure you really want one?" He asked, apparently it was my idea!
"I don't know. Maybe." That must have been good enough, cause that scene ended and next thing I knew I was five weeks pregnant. My stomach was bulging and I could feel a tiny foot tracing it's way across my insides. I was not happy.
I was in a white house, looking out the window, wondering what I was going to do about this. I was overwhelmed with anxiety and hopelessness. The house had a porch and cement steps, and the first thing I thought of as I ran my fingers over that tiny foot pressing through my skin was to jump down the stairs. It was only three feet, but I thought it might somehow dislodge the fetus growing inside me. I tried it and weirdly sailed down the stairs horizontally, rather than vertically, landing gently in the grass.
I stood up and went back into the house, refusing to accept defeat. I thought about how it would be another eight more years of constant supervision, eight more years of constant attention, eight more years of careful planning. I started looking for cramp bark tea (which is actually to prevent cramps, not cause them). I was sure this was going to work! I just had to find the tea quickly! If I had to wait to go to the store it I was sure it would be too late.
I began frantically searching through the pantry, cupboards, everywhere, fighting time. I was also berating myself for getting into this situation in the first place. What was I thinking?!?! Why had I done this!?!? I couldn't find the tea and sat miserable and dejected on the stairs. Suddenly it was a full, long, high staircase in an ice cream parlor. I woke up before I could jump a second time and as I drifted back into consciousness the dread slowly melted away and I realized it was only a dream. Thank god it was only a dream!