Monday, October 20, 2008

The Saga Continues . . .

When last we left our heroine, she was finally starting to find her way through this strange new Spanish world she found herself in. She was settled at her job, her kids were settled at school, she was accepting her apartment even though the occasional cockroach showed up. She was starting to understand what the crazy cozmic cat was saying on TV and most of all, looking forward to the Spanish version of The Amazing Race every Sunday night. In short, things were going well.
Yet . . . As always . . . Something would go terribly wrong . . .
Date: Saturday, October 18th
Time: 18:48:23
Location: Calle San Miguel, B-1, 3-A (Our Hapless Heroine's Apartment)
Official Report: HH was sitting down in her favorite ugly brown chair, getting ready to enjoy several hours of mindless internet activity. YouTube videos were going to be watched (What The Buck, Chris Crocker, Smosh, Fred, Lisa Nova), Skype and Windows online conversations were going to take place, MySpace and Facebook were going to be checked and updated. Obviously, it was going to be a full evening. Several minutes into the latest Lisa Nova video (a mildly amusing parody of the third presidential debate) HH noticed that the battery was low and needed to be recharged. As she had many times before she reached for the plug and stuck it in the jack. The computer sounded its familiar 'BEEEEEEEEEP!', letting HH know the charger was properly installed and working. HH settled back down to the video. Suddenly, without warning there was a second 'BEEEEEEEEEP!' and a third 'BEEEEEEEEEP!' then the charger plug completely fell out of the back of the computer!! HH tried to re-insert the malbehaving plug to no avail. Upon inspection, HH realized that the jack had dislodged and was barely even visible! Just then, the battery gave its, 'Seriously, bitch, charge me or I'm going to fucking die!' signal. HH had no choice but to turn off her companion, her confidant, her one true lifeline in Spain! Then she shoved many objects into the jack trying to put it back where it belongs, thus undoubtedly voiding her warrenty.
Tune in tomorrow as HH attempts to take it to the local computer shop to get it fixed! Will they charge her more than the computer's worth? Will they even be able to fix it? Will HH be able to translate things like 'jack' and 'plug' without sexual inuendo and ensuing hilarity? Find out all his and more than you ever wanted to, same time, same place (the library, since I don't have a fucking computer anymore!!!!!) same crappy country! NEXT TIME!!! Traaaaa laaaaaaa laaaaaaa! Lalalala! Fuuuuuuuuccccckkkkk!!

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