Monday, September 22, 2008

Shitty Connections

So, what is with making people go from one airport to another to catch their next flight? And what is with this happening in London? And what is with said airports being an hour away from each other? And the shuttle from one airport to the other holds a monopoly and charges $40 per person. Two of my people are children so they will be $20. Eighty dollars for us to go 30 miles!
For a minute I thought I could rent a car for cheaper. I quickly realized I would kill us all trying to navigate through London while attempting to drive on the wrong side of the road.
I also thought I might take the "Underground", but we have to uncheck our bags and take them with us and the website said something about it not being very fun to drag your suitcases around a busy subway with irritated Londoners just getting off work.
I would surely loose at least two suitcases and one child attempting a feat like that.
I've also tried to look into taking what they call a 'black taxi' which are the official London cabs. But that would be expensive and I'm not certain they are allowed out of official London city limits. The last thing I want (besides loosing children in the subway and paying $80) is to be stranded on the outskirts of London with copious amounts of luggage and cranky children.
So in desperation, I've posted this ad on London Craigslist:

For God's Sake! Someone Give Me A Ride From Heathrow to Gatwick!

I will be arriving the 24th at 4:30 at Heathrow! I will be tired and totally broke (SO DON'T BOTHER TRYING TO STEAL ANYTHING FROM ME!) I will have a few bags full of second hand clothes and maybe a toothbrush. I don't want to pay an outrageous fee for the shuttle. Monopolies are a bad thing, coming from America, I know this first hand. Indeed, I may not even have the money to pay for said shuttle as they quote the price in pounds and I get very confused. In America, things aren't going so well as you may have heard. All my money went to bail out AIG, FANNY and FREDDY, as you well know.
ANYWAY! Please give me a ride to my connection. When I booked the flight I didn't realize the airports were an hour apart! Clueless American that I am! Find it in your kind Londoner heart to do your former compatriot (and by this I mean pre-revolution, which was a complete waste of time as we would obviously be better off had we stayed under British rule) a huge, soul saving favor and transfer me from one blessed airport to the other.
Thank you!

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